Whether you're behind "Team Harry" or feeling more "Spare Me" the details, the autobiography of the second son of Prince (now king) Charles and Princess Di, offers some insight into the life of the royals, but most "bombshells" are limited to the accounts of Prince Harry's military service in Afghanistan.
"Spare", the story of Prince Harry published earlier this year, is divided into three sections: early life, military service and Meghan. I found the first part the most compelling. Here, Harry talks about the roles and family dynamics, which, though subject to more public fodder than the rest of us 99 percenters, there's still a universal element at the core. One of my favorite stories takes place at Christmas time and involves the annual review of the chart of service.
This tradition started with King George V, as noted in the recent biography of his only daughter, "Princess Mary: The First Modern Princess" (an upcoming Tea and Tomes). George V, the grandfather of Queen Elizabeth and great-grandfather of King Charles, had a strong sense of duty and expected the same of his family. He devised a type of manual spreadsheet where his children could list the number of public appearances for charitable causes throughout the year and he would review when all were gathered for Christmas.
In the true spirt of crazy relations rivalry or those obnoxious "gunners" in the workplace, from Harry's point of view, the tradition of the charity map has devolved into a competitive, cutthroat event, where participants list things that don't even fit the purpose just to inflate their numbers. Many can raise a hand and share - the royals aren't the only ones who have to deal with such antics.
Aside from some holiday chaos, the first section of "Spare" also includes honest memories of Harry's mother, who could go from loving and fun in compressed togetherness to being absent for extended periods of time. His father could be sweet, but also distant and awkward. The one constant - and, I think, the biggest impact of the book - is its account of the relentless, truly savage, pursuit of the royals by the paparazzi. A double-edged sword, to be sure, as royals have also tried to manipulate the press to their favor. In either case, it seems to be a sad endeavor by all parties involved.
The second section segues to Harry's military time - surprisingly sluggish in storytelling for what should otherwise read as an admirable, page-turning, tour of duty. Despite this, I did leave these many chapters with an appreciation for his determination to serve despite his privilege and his devotion to wounded soldiers.
The last section of "Spare" focuses on Harry and Meghan. It's clear, he was smitten from the get-go and was willing to give up royal obligations - if that is really a great deal to walk away from - and devote his time to his wife and family. He's also a bit more forgiving of Meghan's family drama, but maybe that's not his story to tell.
I think there are a lot of contradictions in Harry's narrative, but I also think we're all guilty of that from time to time. I didn't see any "smoking guns" - a few dismissive comments, certainly, - but anything that would be worthy of irreconcilable differences? I don't think so. (Think of your last extended family Thanksgiving dinner). Lots of petty gripes, but, aside from the palaces, jewels, incredible wealth and public fascination, the royals and their family dynamics appear to be no different than the rest of us. There's just no one offering us a multi-million dollar book deal to spill the lukewarm tea.
I enjoy reading royal biographies and borrowed Spare from my sister-in-law, who was gifted the tome in January.This year, I've also read, Princess Mary, Queen Victoria (a family heirloom from 1897) & Elizabeth I. All of these books will be featured in future BTS's Tuesday Tea and Tomes!
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